Problem: Adults Too Involved in Meetings

A reader wrote to me with this question:

Looking for a little advice. My daughter recently joined a newly formed Venture Crew. The adults involved are very enthusiastic, which is great, but they tend to talk over the kids and take over the meetings. Some of the adults are keeping the kids form running the meetings successfully. My daughter doesn’t want to be rude, but she doesn’t feel that the adults are allowing them to make progress without being involved in every step of the process and she doesn’t know how to approach them.

These adults have been involved in Scouting for 30+ years and are a very important resource. No one wants to lessen the importance of their contributions… but the kids don’t want to listen to 30 minutes of  reminiscing .

Any words of wisdom?

This situation is common in new units. Adults care deeply about Scouting. They want things to run smoothly. They have years of stories and lessons to share. But Venturing is designed for youth leadership. If adults lead every discussion, teens do not grow into leaders.

Venturing is meant for older youth. They are capable of planning and running their own meetings. They will not do it perfectly. That is part of the process. If adults fix every mistake, the teens lose the chance to learn.

The adults with this Venturing Crew likely mean well. No one doubts their commitment. But when adults dominate meetings, the program shifts away from its purpose. The goal is not a perfect meeting. The goal is youth leadership.

Venturing follows the youth-led model used throughout Scouting America. Officers are elected by the Crew. They are responsible for planning meetings and activities. Adults serve as Advisors. Their role is to guide, not to run the show.

Teens learn leadership by doing the work themselves. They learn how to plan agendas. They learn how to manage time. They learn how to solve problems. If an adult steps in every few minutes, that growth stops.

Sometimes meetings will be messy. Discussions may wander. Plans may need revision. That is normal. Growth often comes through trial and error. Adults must allow space for that process.

If youth never get to practice leadership, they will not build confidence. Venturing is built on youth ownership. When adults talk over teens, it sends the message that youth cannot handle responsibility. That weakens the program.

One simple solution is physical space. If possible, divide the room. Let the youth sit together at one table. Ask the adults to sit in another area. When adults sit among the teens, it is easy for them to jump in.

Another idea is to set clear meeting roles. Youth run the agenda. Adults speak only if asked. This can be agreed upon before the meeting begins. Clear expectations prevent awkward moments later.

Some Crews choose to meet in public places. A restaurant or community space can help. Youth can sit at their own table. Adults can sit nearby. That small distance makes a big difference.

You can also build in a short review time. After the meeting, youth and adults can talk for five or ten minutes. Adults can offer advice then. This keeps feedback structured and prevents interruptions during the meeting.

Youth officers may need to speak directly to the adults. This can feel uncomfortable. Still, honesty is often the best path. Officers should talk together first. They need to agree on what they want to say.

They might say something like this: We want to grow as leaders. We need to run our meetings ourselves. Could you please sit on the other side of the room and let us try? We would appreciate your feedback afterward.

This approach shows respect. It does not attack anyone. It focuses on growth and leadership. Adults usually respond well when they understand the purpose behind the request.

Teens should remember that experienced Scouters care about them. They are not enemies. Clear communication builds trust. When youth speak calmly and confidently, adults often step back.

Adults who have been in Scouting for decades bring valuable experience. They know what works and what fails. That knowledge matters. But in Venturing, their role changes.

Instead of directing meetings, they become mentors. They observe. They listen. They offer advice at the right time. This shift can be hard for long-time leaders.

Training can help. A reminder about the youth-led method can refocus everyone. Sometimes adults simply need encouragement to trust the teens.

When adults step back, they often see teens rise to the challenge. Youth surprise us when given real responsibility. Trust builds confidence on both sides.

Adult Leadership or Adult Campout?

How Can You Have a Youth Led Unit When the Scouts Are All New?

Why do adults step in so often at meetings?

Most adults step in because they care. They want meetings to run well. They have many years of experience. They see problems coming and want to fix them quickly. They are trying to help. But constant stepping in keeps youth from learning how to solve those problems on their own.

Is it disrespectful to ask adults to step back?

No, it is not disrespectful if it is done kindly. Youth can speak clearly and calmly. They can explain that they want to grow as leaders. They can thank the adults for their support. Most adults will respond well when they understand the goal is youth leadership.

What if the adults get defensive?

That can happen. Some adults feel hurt if they think they are not needed. Stay calm. Repeat the goal. The goal is leadership growth for the teens. It helps to include the Crew Advisor in the discussion. A private conversation often works better than a public one.

Should parents get involved?

Parents should be careful. Venturing is youth-led. Teens should try to solve the problem first. If the issue continues, a parent can speak with the Advisor quietly. The focus should stay on the program and youth leadership, not on blaming anyone.

What if meetings fall apart without adult help?

Meetings might feel messy at first. That is normal. Teens are still learning. Let them try again. Adults can give feedback after the meeting. Over time, the youth will improve. Leadership skills grow through practice.

How much should adults talk during a meeting?

Adults should speak only when needed. They should give safety guidance or step in if something serious is wrong. Otherwise, they should observe. Their main role is to advise and mentor, not to run the meeting.

Can this hurt the Crew long term?

Yes, if youth never get to lead, they may lose interest. Venturing works best when teens feel ownership. If adults control everything, the program starts to feel like a classroom instead of a youth group. Giving youth real responsibility keeps them engaged and invested.

Venturing is designed to be youth led. Teens elect officers and plan their own meetings. Adults serve as Advisors and mentors. Problems begin when adults step in too often. They may talk over the youth or take control of discussions. Even when they mean well, this prevents teens from building real leadership skills.

Experienced Scouters are valuable. They bring years of knowledge and care deeply about the program. But Venturing works best when adults guide from the sidelines. Teens need room to make decisions, solve problems, and even make mistakes. Growth happens through practice. Perfect meetings are not the goal. Leadership development is the goal.

Small changes can help restore balance. Adults can sit apart from the youth during meetings. The Crew can set clear expectations about who runs the agenda. A short review time after meetings allows adults to offer advice without interrupting. These simple steps protect youth leadership while still honoring adult experience.

Clear and respectful communication also matters. Youth officers can explain that they want to grow as leaders. Adults often respond well when they understand the purpose. When everyone understands their role, the Crew becomes stronger. Teens gain confidence, and adults see the results of stepping back.