I’ve Come to Marry the Princess Skit

This is LC’s favorite skit. I hope you’ve seen it. If not, I’ll describe it below. I’ll try to do it justice.

One of the great things about this skit is that the characters can be changed around a little to make it more fun. I’ve seen a very funny Star Wars version. And I remember one with the Kool Aid man in it from a while back. I can’t remember exactly how he fit in, but I remember he kept saying “Oh Yeah…”.

Most of the time, I’ve seen this done with just two people. They just keep moving down the line, switching characters. I have seen larger groups do it also though, with each person just playing one of the characters, but it is really funny with just two.

I’ve Come to Marry the Princess Skit

A prop or piece of costume for each character helps to distinguish them. Also, it might be helpful to have a line of chairs or milk crates to designate a “place” for each separate character.

Scout 1 knocks on a “door”. Scout 2 opens it.
Scout 1 (in the part of the suitor): “I’ve come to marry the princess.”
Scout 2 (in the part of the doorman): “The princess?”
Scout 1: “Yes, the princess.”
Scout 2. “Wait here. I’ll ask the king.”

Scout 1 now runs around to the other side of  Scout 2 to play the part of the king.
Scout 2: “King, there is a man here who wants to marry the princess.”
Scout 1 (as the King) : “The princess?”
Scout 2: “Yes the princess.”
Scout 1: “I’ll have to ask the queen”.

Scout 2 now goes around to the other side of Scout 1 to play the part of the Queen.
Scout 1: “Queen, there is a man here who wants to marry the princess.”
Scout 2 (as the Queen in his most hammed up older lady voice): “The princess?”
Scout 1: “Yes, the princess.”
Scout 2: “I’ll have to ask the princess.”

Scout 1 now runs to the other side of Scout 2 to play the part of the Princess.
Scout 2: “Princess, there is a man here who wants to marry you.”
Scout 1 (as the Princess in a very hammed up young lady voice): “The answer is no!”

Scout 1 now runs back to the King’s place.
Scout 2 (turning to the King) : “The answer is no!”

Scout 2 now runs back to the doorman’s place
Scout 1 (turning to the doorman): “The answer is no!”

Scout 1 now goes back to the suitor’s place.
Scout 2 (turning to the suitor) : “The answer is no!”

Scout 1 (as the suitor): “Then die!”
Scout 1 (the suitor) kills Scout 2 (the doorman).

Now it starts all over. This time Scout 2 answers the door as the king. The message and the answer go back up and down the row, and in the end, the suitor kills the king.

Start over again, with Scout 2 answering the door as the queen. The message and answer go back up and down the row, and the suitor kills the queen.

Finally, Scout 1 knocks at the door as the suitor and Scout 2 answers as the princess.
Scout 1: “Princess, I’ve come to marry you!”
Scout 2: “Are you rich?”
Scout 1: “Yes!”
Scout 2: “OK!” and they walk off together hand in hand.